Archive for Random

Hypothetically Speaking…

So…hypothetically speaking…what if someone offered you a free ticket to the Britney Spears concert tonight? 

And, just hypothetically, let’s say you accepted the offer, even though the last thing you’re familiar with Britney singing was from her days on the Disney channel? 

And, what if you suddenly realized that the hypothetical group of girls you’re going with to this completely hypothetical concert were all girls in their early to mid twenties and that you’re going to be the “old” girl in the group?

Would you hypothetically have a panic attack because you just know you’re going to be the huge dork that doesn’t know any Britney songs and shows up looking like a grandma with her cardigan sweater and a cane in hand?

And, of course just being purely hypothetical, would you get on itunes yesterday to download all of the Britney songs that appeared to be the least bit popular and listen to them over and over again in an effort to be able to bob your head along with the beat and lip sinc the lyrics? 

Just hypothetically, would you dash to the mall last night and scurry around to find a top to wear that will deceive everyone into thinking that you’re absolutely NOT 31? 

Would you?  Just hypothetically, of course…

If I was hypothetically faced with this situation, I would be über excited because I would have hypothetically read this show is supposed to be incredible!  I would also be super excited just for a chance to have a girls’ night out on the town. 

Oh, but did I mention this is all purely hypothetical?

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I Heart Weekends

I’m tired.  Our weekend was busy, busy, busy. 

Because I have nothing better to write about, I’m going to give you the über-exciting play-by-play.

We started off Saturday morning by helping some dear friends move all of their belongings from an apartment to their newly-purchased, super cute house (that’s only THREE minutes away from ours…HOORAY!).  By the end of the moving extravaganza, Trav and I realized how ridiculously out of shape we both are…an unpleasant realization, as pool season is just around the corner.  I’ve got to get my hiney in gear. 

We then buzzed out to a garden center, in order to find out what it’s going to take to no longer have the white-trash yard on the block.  At the beginning of winter, some punks came to our house, tore out all of our flowerbeds, and destroyed our grass.  They also took loads of our money with them.  It was a sad day.  Supposedly, all of that “work” is supposed to somehow fix some foundation issues we were having. 

Now warmer weather is arriving and green grass, daffodils, crocus, and forsythia are popping up all over the place.  Except in our yard.  We’re just growing dirt.  It’s pretty. 

Macho Man Trav is on it, though.  He’s gung-ho and determined to restore our yard back to a lush pad of green.

I digress.

After that, we went shopping at the Plaza to take full advantage of the Banana Republic/Gap coupon that I had on hand.  Trav made out like a bandit with all sorts of snazzy new work clothes.  I was having an extreme fat day and didn’t have ANY luck.  I thought I was at least going home with a crazy-cool bracelet I had been eyeing that was now on sale.  After paying for our purchases, I asked the lady for the bracelet so I could put it on and wear it (yes, I’m like a kid who just bought new shoes).  It didn’t fit.  Evidently I have chunky wrists.  Obviously, this wasn’t what I needed to happen on an already fat day. 

I returned the bracelet.

After all that hard work, we were ready for a night out on the town. 

Lucky for us, Trav’s sister, Lara, was in town.  We had to absolutely twist her arm to babysit Arle, but she finally obliged.  Obviously, that’s a complete lie.  She gladly took the child-rearing reigns and allowed us to have a date that was free from constantly watching the clock and thinking about how we needed to get home early as to avoid going broke after paying a babysitter. 

Thank you, Lara!

So, out the door we went with our fab friends, Brad and Bekka.  We went to a great little French restaurant called Aixois and it was delish!  Great wine, great conversation, great snails, great service, great dessert, great everything. 

We then met up with some other friends and went to a dueling piano bar.  Have you ever been to one of these?  I thought I had, but am now pretty sure I have not.  I was under the impression that we were going to a peaceful, dimly-lit, sophisticated bar that had nice piano music in the background. 

Not so.

The place we went was the complete opposite of what I imagined, but provided some fantastic people watching opportunities.  Again, great times with great friends. 

This was, by far, the latest Trav and I had been out in quite some time.  We were tired, tired, tired by the time our heads hit our pillows. 

Yesterday, we slept in, went to church, came home and took naps, walked to the park, walked to Starbucks, walked home, ate an easy-breezy meal of grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, then watched our favorite show, Amazing Race. 

I mean, really, could I ask for a better weekend?  I think not. 

Tata for now…I’m off to workout.  Anybody know any good wrist-whittling exercises?

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They Come From All Around

I love to look at my blog stats page and see how Momdiggity visitors get to my site.  Lately, I’ve noticed a couple of funny Google search phrases have led people to my blog. 

I’m sure the person that searched for, “Elephant frosting decoration” was extremely disappointed when she saw my elephant abomination

The person that typed in, “How do I unstop a toilet without a plunger” obviously didn’t get what they were looking for when Google led them to “Fiery Trav.” 

Hopefully, they at least had a good laugh in their time of need…

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THREE Hours

Last night, I wasted THREE hours of my life.  THREE hours that I can never get back.  THREE hours that should have been spent on something important like waxing my upper lip (not that this would have taken three hours, but it desperately needs to be done). 

Instead, I spent THREE hours watching The Bachelor.  Two weeks ago, my mother-in-law was visiting and, as a devoted Bachelor fan, didn’t want to miss the fantasy date episode.  Trav and I had not watched a single episode this season, but wanted to be good hosts and therefore, watched with her. 

I’m now convinced that ABC transports some sort of addictive substance through the T.V. screen because, after one episode, I just had to see who Jason chose in the end.  I somehow wrangled control of the remote from Trav and proceeded to watch a train-wreck right before my eyes.

I watched enough of the previous season of The Bachelor to know that the world thought Jason was the perfect guy. 

What kind of “perfect guy” breaks up with his poor fiance on national television???   Unbelievable! 

And then for him to immediately go back to Molly?  Geez, Louise.  The entire thing was absurd. 

One thing I found laughable was the amount of tears this guy produced during the show.  Don’t get me wrong, I can totally appreciate a guy that’s not afraid to show his emotions.  But there comes a time and place where you need to man up and hold yourself together…especially when you’re the one causing the drama. 

I think it’s hilarious they now have to air a second “After The Final Rose” episode.  I’m predicting that Jason will dump Molly and make out with Deanna.  Anybody want to put some money on it???

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60’s, Baby!

My writer’s block is continuing into Wednesday.  No gatherings to prepare for today, but the gorgeous weather is wooing me out into the sunshine.  It’s supposed to get up to 69 degrees today, which is an absolute miracle for February in this neck of the woods. 

We’ve already been to the park for a play-date, had a picnic lunch out on the deck, and now I’m going to attempt to do some tidying up around the yard. 

Sorry, my peeps, but the LAST thing I want to do is be inside, staring at my computer. 

How’s that for an exciting blog entry?  I’m surely going to win a Pulitzer for this one…

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Validation

A friend sent me the following article and I really enjoyed it.  In a nutshell, it’s a question from a childless woman about why moms don’t have enough time to get it all done.  I thought the response by columnist Carolyn Hax of the Washington Post was fabulous. 

It’s so easy, as a mom, to forget how many “hats” I wear throughout the day.  Sometimes I wonder the same thing about myself…Why did I not accomplish more?  Why didn’t I call this person?  Why didn’t I take a shower?  Why didn’t I take time to workout? 

Oh, that’s right, I was trying to make sure Arle received the proper ratio of cheese and apple juice.  I was cleaning the floors again and again and again.  I was potty-training.  I was paying bills.  I was cleaning the bathrooms.  I was calling the cable company.  I was this, I was that. 

Most importantly, I was teaching this amazing little girl the ways of the world, and I don’t take that job lightly. 

It’s important.  It’s a gift.  It’s fun.  It’s challenging.  It’s entertaining.  It’s consuming.  It’s amazing. 

It will be over in a flash and I don’t want to miss a thing. 

article

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Good Girl Gone Bad

Growing up, I was pretty much a goody-goody.  Just ask my brothers.  They love to remind me of this fact.  They act like it’s a bad thing, but looking back on it, I’m soooooo glad I was. 

I attempted to run with the “wild” crowd in 6th and 7th grades, but soon realized that I wasn’t very good at being “bad.” 

My older brother was the rebel in the family and watching him make his mistakes was probably the best medicine for me.  I’ve always said he was a great role model for me, because I pretty much knew that, as long as I did the opposite of what he was doing, life would be much easier.

So, here I am at age 31, and I’ve rebelled and done something I never thought would do.  I’ve done something irresponsible and crazy.  Something looked down upon by the masses.  Brace yourselves, because your perception of me is about to change….FOREVER. 

I’ve dropped out of school.

That’s right.  I’m officially a Ju-Co drop out. 

Last night I went to my third cake decorating class.  Half-way through, I decided I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I have now officially wasted six hours of my life on this class, and I refuse to waste anymore time on it.  I looked over at Kristin and told her I didn’t want to come back next week for the last class.  She jumped on board with my plan ASAP.  We’re dropping out together, which somehow makes me feel better about the whole thing. 

I’m trying to remember the last time I actually quit something, but am having a hard time coming up with any examples.  I’m sure there’s something I’ve quit, but it’s just not a normal thing I do. 

And I’m not giving up on cake decorating all together, either.  I’m just giving up on this ridiculous class.  Kristin and I are convinced that we can be fantastic cake decorators, which is bizarre because we truly were the worst students in the class.  We couldn’t make icing roses if our lives depended on it.  I really tried, too, but just couldn’t get it.  Kristin pretty much put threw her piping bag down and gave up after her first failed attempt.  We just keep telling ourselves we only stink at that style of decorating and that we could do our style SO much better. 

We’re totally going to have cake decorating sessions on our own and I’m sure our creations will end up on the pages of Martha Stewart magazine.  Just wait and see.  Martha will probably even want us to come on her show and demonstrate our innovative skills.  I should probably start interviewing nannies now, because I can just see my life getting pretty busy and hectic once Kristin and I hit the road for our book signing tour.  You will all be able to say you knew me before I became a star. 

Lucky you.

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